It is day 22 and I am on my way to the next level...or I am keeping the faith that what I am doing is taking me there. Not gonna lie, it hasn't been the easiest 4 days. I've been waking up at 5:45am every day (even on the weekends), journaling, affirming, visualizing, exercising, meditating and reading. I freakin' gained a pound and was not feeling happy and joyous. Like, what the well?!
I realized this morning that I am expecting something to happen and to happen now. I am impatient. I want to see mountains moving. Lol. As I write this I know i'm being ridiculous. I know I need to continue doing the "things". I need to model those who have done it and have been successful.
The thing I have finally come to understand, that I have heard time and again is that "success is lonely". I feel lonely. I am not even at the level of financial success that I am working towards and I feel this way. I just don't personally know anyone who is giving so much of themselves into "becoming". I don't mean any disrespect to you whatsoever. All I mean is it feels that way. Alone. Uncertain. As if I don't have someone to talk to who can really comprehend my feelings, the bumps in my road. Silly of me to think I knew all of the bumps that would come. Duh. This is one of them. The questioning. The uncertainty. It is part of it. If it were easy, everyone would do it. I assure you, everyone is not doing "it".
I do know I must focus on what I can control. What has worked in the past. That I must continue to practice gratitude. That I must continue to grind and take massive action every single day. That I must continue to hold myself to a higher standard because, its the small changes we make every day that will result in the biggest shifts. I do KNOW this because, I did do this when I decided 10 years ago that I was going to make that damn cheer team no matter freakin' what. I became who I HAD to become. I pushed through when it was hard. I pushed through my old stories.
So, today I give you my word that I am keeping the faith and trudging forward even though it sometimes sucks ass.
Here's a quote I read last night "Who you're becoming is far more important than what you're doing. And yet, it is what you're doing that is determining who you're becoming" --Hal Elrod
Cheers to having faith which, in the PAST was hard as shit for me but, I'm leaping anyway.
